We are constantly searching for validation. Validation that we are smart, pretty, loved... whatever we feel like we are missing. But so many of us go about searching for that validation in the wrong way.
We seek validation from others instead of seeking it from ourselves. Stop worrying about how others perceive you and learn to love yourself first – flaws and all. This has taken me entirely too long to understand and I feel like I’ve finally begun to love myself for who I am. As I’ve stated before, I’m not perfect and I never will be. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not a great person capable of remarkable and wonderful things. I used to think that I had to hide my flaws: my tendency to overanalyze, my trust issues, my past. Hell, I used to be afraid to admit that I still get scared of my basement sometimes… (It’s more common than you think, okay?!) I have a tattoo on my ribs that reads “What sets you apart may seem like a burden, but it’s what makes you great.” That’s something that we all need to be reminded of. Without our flaws, nothing would set us apart and there would be nothing to make us unique – special. Learn to love your special qualities, whatever they may be. You don’t need anyone else’s validation but your own. Once you learn to love yourself, only then can you learn to love others and others will love you even more than they already do. They’ll fall in love with your confidence, your charisma, and all those things that set you apart that you were so quick to hide. We all have things that we can work on, but that’s what makes us human. I used to depend on others to believe in me because I couldn’t believe in myself. Now I’ve learned to accept myself and love myself more than ever. Accept yourself for who you are. I promise that when you do, you’ll wonder what took you so long.
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I recently had a conversation with one of my friends regarding this blog. I was worried that it was becoming too motivational-related and I didn’t want it to come off as tacky. His response was that “even if it was, would that be such a bad thing?”
The answer is no. It made me think about why I was so worried about it in the first place... I realized that somehow many of us have come to the conclusion that motivation is cheesy. I’ve heard people ridicule others for posting inspirational quotes as Facebook statuses or tweets numerous times. But why should we limit the amount of inspiration or motivation that we post or share with one another? Shouldn’t we be encouraging this behavior? When did positivity become so far gone that we put down those who are only trying to foster that way of thinking? We should be attempting to radiate positivity, light, and love. Not suppressing it for fear of being made fun of for “being too motivational.” Because honestly, if people are going to reject you for something so optimistic, do you really want those people in your life anyway? One of the keys to success in life is to keep your mind on a positive track and by reading brilliant quotes we can help nurture the growth of that positivity. What we think really does matter. If we want to be motivated, positive, and inspired, we must think motivating, positive, and inspiring thoughts. With that said, I want to share with you some of my favorite motivational and inspirational quotes to help you get through whatever may be going on in your lives.
Feel free to comment below with some of your favorite quotes. Thanks for reading! I’d like to share with you all an excerpt from a short story that I recently wrote. Sometimes we forget how much we matter and we let others dictate our moods and behaviors. I’m guilty of this, but I’m working on improving that. Change your perspective and you can change your life. As Aristotle once said: “Happiness depends on ourselves.” * * * Excerpt from Someday by Megan Chaffee I still experience feelings of worthlessness, but I feel as though the broken person I became is slowly piecing back together into the person I used to be. I’m just now finally starting to get back on my feet. I’ve tried so hard to let the hatred go, but it’s tough to remember how good people can be when people you cared about had no problem hurting you. We cannot let ourselves become consumed in rage brought on by other people. We can choose to learn from our mistakes or we can continue living in a way that pushes everyone away. Deep down, I know I am worth it. Deep down, I know I am a good person. Deep down, I know I’ll find happiness. Someday. * * * I hope that you all remember that you are worth it… That whatever life throws at you, you can overcome. You are stronger than you think and capable of so much more than you may believe.
Happy Monday, guys. It’s a little past 3 a.m. and I can’t sleep.
What is it about nighttime that seems to make us more reflective, more reminiscent, more aware of our thoughts and feelings? It’s almost ironic. I mean, pitch black often signifies emptiness – nothingness… Right? Yet it’s commonly as we lay in the dark of our bedrooms that our brains go into overdrive, thinking of everything and anything all at once. Maybe we are just inherently afraid of that darkness. Perhaps we fear the emptiness that pitch black suggests. We want to fill the voids in our lives, so our minds react by attempting to illuminate that darkness by releasing our thoughts and feelings. It's easy to get stuck in these over analytical late-night moods and suddenly we find ourselves upset and overwhelmed. But it's important to remember (and excuse my super-cliche phrasing) that the sun will always rise. I guess what I'm trying to say is that when you find yourself trapped in your thoughts as you lay in your bed, just take a moment to remember that it's temporary. Take a few deep breaths, read a book, listen to music, edit your blog (ha)... Whatever works to relax your mind. But stop over-analyzing. Stop dwelling on negative or stressing thoughts. The darkness doesn't last forever, and soon light will flood through our windows again. But why? Well, here’s the story:
Let me preface this by saying most of us were brats in high school… So try not to judge me too harshly. During my sophomore year of high school my old friend Jordie and I were on the dance team. There were some girls in our grade that Jordie and I were not particularly fond of – to put it simply. In typical fifteen-year-old fashion we decided that it would be a great idea to give them old lady names: Cheryl, Beatrice, etc. Think grandma. That way we could talk about them without anyone else knowing or finding out… Duh. What other reason would there be? Unfortunately, we were not as clever as we thought. The juniors on the dance team figured out our system and one in particular, Kailee (little did I know she would become one of my best friends), decided to give us not-so-secretive old man names in return. And thus: Norman was born. The funny thing is nobody remembers Jordie’s old man name but mine stuck… and has for 7 years now. I’m known by many variations: Baby Norm, Normie, Normandy. But mostly I’m known simply as Norm. I’m constantly introduced as such & most times it takes a while for people to realize that Norm is not my actual name. Introductions with parents are always the most entertaining: “Is that short for Norma?” Most of them still decide to call me Norm even after they find out my real name. I don't mind. I embrace it. After all, how often does it happen that somebody gets a nickname so completely random AND it just so happens to stick? So there you have it! The answer to one of life's greatest mysteries - why Norm? And now here I am, inspired by my friend Nicole to embrace myself and all my Norm-isms with my very own blog. So hopefully you’ll stick around to check out my ramblings and thoughts as they make their way Outside of the Norm and into the great abyss that is the internet. Enjoy! |
I'm Megan.
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